Sunday, August 17, 2008

...I wonder why I can't do anything right.

So, I have a biggish family. Nothing that will get me on a TLC program. Yes, I may have six, but they are not all two. I cringe at 18 - Jim Bob leave the poor woman alone. I will admit to a fascination with the large family "reality" shows. Just this past week there was a woman with seven on Super Nanny.

For those of you joining this blog already in progress, you may want to research my feelings on P31 as all us cool girls call it. So combine "reality" tv and P31 and a little shoulder devil and give me some chocolate, I've found a whole new way to compare myself to everyone who has it all together.

What was the tipping point? Paper plates. All the cool super moms with large broods use the paper plates. Apparently you can buy them at the warehouse stores for two cents per hundred. You will have to use approximately 100 per person per day, but you never have to do dishes. Just think of all the money you will save by not running the dishwasher, you can use it for something cool like extra trash service.

I will quickly dismiss this house management tip by holding up my green sign. And for extra measure, I will wear my (what is the color of the polar bear awareness ribbon?) ribbon to make you all feel guilty about what you are doing to the polar ice caps. This being an election year, you will be able to find both sides of my position on polar bears and global warming.

Position A. Polar bears are cute. You are the higher species, you must preserve and protect the constitution of the polar bear.

Position B. You've heard of volcanoes right? Well, they send more pollutants into the air in one eruption that all of the industrialized nations have in all of their history and the earth takes care of it. I would mention God, but I don't know your specific beliefs and therefore will defer to the mother earth. Unless of course you'd like for me to believe in God, then I do but would never let him have any influence over my civic duty. This is Annie and I approve this paragraph.

It's taken me (this number removed by blog author) years to get a little bit of my act together. I've been on Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover a record 6.5 years. So, I didn't drink the Kool Aid til about six months ago, but we had a few issues higher than money to deal with, like our marriage and our faith and 20 some foster type children, but now I'm totally on board. All these years I've been doing something wrong and it's not the paper plates. I've been allowing myself to be the self that others thought I should be, whether it was my parents or my ex husband or a teacher or whomever I let hold sway over my life.

My husband told me today I needed to revisit my life through my own eyes. I may just have to do that. I may find that I'm smarter, and more beautiful, and more together than the rest of y'all thought I was.


Megan said...

I used to listen to Dave Ramsey on talk radio every day, but finally I stopped. I totally believe in his advice and program, but I am SO not ready for the beans and rice, rice and beans program. I have not charges anything in a couple years, but still have one account open for emergencies.

Thanks for the FYI on the agencies and the numerous babies at the party. I think I am going to go straight CPS. My dad and stepmother know some caseworkers in Alice pretty well and I would definitely prefer outside of Nueces county so I don't have to deal with Judge Lewis.

Sohl Gal said...

I call my crazy, perfectionistic, over-demanding background voice Margaret. She's a stupid liar. I'm glad to hear that whether or not you've named yours, you recognize the ridiculous standards to which we try to hold ourselves, especially as Christians. Rock on, sister. Just like you do!

DA Wagners said...

I think if we all revisited ourselves in our own eyes, we would be all a lot better off. I sometimes think a woman's worst enemy is herself and her preocupation with the thoughts of others! We've got to come to the point when we say, "Who cares," and hopefully sooner than later!

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Cast of Characters

  • BOB - Born of the body children
  • BOTH - Born of the heart children
  • Roran aka Big Girl - 18 year old BOB daughter - recently booted from the nest
  • Big Boy - 15 year old BOB son
  • Radical - 9 year old BOB son who fyi is not RAD
  • Felpsy aka lil middle - 4 year old BOTH boy who is RAD and is the cumin in our soup
  • Booger - 4 year old BOTH boy, sib to Felpsy, Twin to....
  • Princess - 4 year old BOTH girl. Diva,