OK. Every parent has gone through the whole negotiating with a toddler thing. It actually doesn't end when they hit school, it just becomes different. If you've watched even one episode of Supernanny or a Dr. Phil parenting tip show you know that there are no exceptions to the rule....Never negotiate with a toddler.
So, as a parent of many, for almost eighteen years I had thought I'd heard it all.
I need a drink.
I need to pee.
I need to poop.
I need some extra love.
I'm going to barf.
I need to do laundry.
I need something signed.
That is until today. I am not a morning person. It has never been a stated rule, but people have figured out that you don't talk to mom until she's had a hot shower and a cold coke. Well, along with a broken water heater, I was just in a lousy mood this morning. We were on our way to church and a song that was annoying me came on and I turned off the radio. This did not sit well with the maestros in the back seat. I told them, no we were not turning it on. Period.
Of course little middle boy decided that he would argue the point. And what came out of his mouth amused me, I took great pride in his thought process and I became frightened for my future. Thankfully, his criminal genius is currently limited by his three year old brain. But if he can negotiate like this as a three year old, what is in store for us?
Before I go on, let me tell you. There is very little negotiating in our house. The offers are lobbied but are not often received. I will give thought to poop and barf. Other than that, you must deal with whatever it is on your own. Now little middle is still not our "real boy" so there are special exceptions that we must consider or face consequences from the state. So, if you hear about us on the news it is because we ignored this cry for help.
....but my heart stopped beeping.
Cast of Characters
- BOB - Born of the body children
- BOTH - Born of the heart children
- Roran aka Big Girl - 18 year old BOB daughter - recently booted from the nest
- Big Boy - 15 year old BOB son
- Radical - 9 year old BOB son who fyi is not RAD
- Felpsy aka lil middle - 4 year old BOTH boy who is RAD and is the cumin in our soup
- Booger - 4 year old BOTH boy, sib to Felpsy, Twin to....
- Princess - 4 year old BOTH girl. Diva,